I can't put a finger on the emotion that I go through every time I hear that another one of my kind has been raped and then left humiliated on the road alone. I first choose to ignore it. Then I think again. If it was someone I knew, it would break my heart. I feel terrified. For my loved ones. My younger siblings. And then I think again. What if it was me. And then the horror surrounds me for days. I travel suspiciously. Taking note of the auto that I travel in. Calling people and mentioning where I am after every few minutes. I look at every man with disgust.
And then begins the great Indian family drama. Girls have curfews. Girls are scolded. Girls are told what to wear, where to go, when to go. But why?
The problem is that we oppose rapes because we think women are weak and they should be protected. If it happens to one girl, we assume that it might happen to others. We go on a defensive mode. Making women feel weaker. There is a thin line between caring for someone and making someone feel incapable to take care of oneself. That thin line is crossed every time you put a curfew on your daughter, you go pick up you sister after dark, and dare your wife smiles at some stranger! Why?
How can we be responsible when we are harassed and still be weak at the same time? Confuses me every single time.
Being protective is out of love. I understand that and appreciated the care. But we need to understand that empowering women is the only way this society can change.Respect for individuals. We all need to learn that. It doesn't mean I am above you as I am a woman. It just means that I m no one less either.
A woman needs to know that she will not be judged and looked down upon with every decision she takes. Being a career woman, doesn't make you bad wife. Being independent doesn't make you any less cultured. Being in relationships other than a marriage doesn't mess up your character. Being married doesn't mean your husband is your god.
Being a woman, I need my independence. I choose not to be weak. Life is complicated and unpredictable. Things will not always go your way. If something goes wrong, I want to fight against it, not hide it to protect myself from the judgmental eyes of the society. I need to be an individual, who needs to be loved and not be protected. And I am sure, that is what the female you love and respect, your mother, your daughter, your sister, your wife, your friend needs from you.
And then begins the great Indian family drama. Girls have curfews. Girls are scolded. Girls are told what to wear, where to go, when to go. But why?
The problem is that we oppose rapes because we think women are weak and they should be protected. If it happens to one girl, we assume that it might happen to others. We go on a defensive mode. Making women feel weaker. There is a thin line between caring for someone and making someone feel incapable to take care of oneself. That thin line is crossed every time you put a curfew on your daughter, you go pick up you sister after dark, and dare your wife smiles at some stranger! Why?
How can we be responsible when we are harassed and still be weak at the same time? Confuses me every single time.
Being protective is out of love. I understand that and appreciated the care. But we need to understand that empowering women is the only way this society can change.Respect for individuals. We all need to learn that. It doesn't mean I am above you as I am a woman. It just means that I m no one less either.
A woman needs to know that she will not be judged and looked down upon with every decision she takes. Being a career woman, doesn't make you bad wife. Being independent doesn't make you any less cultured. Being in relationships other than a marriage doesn't mess up your character. Being married doesn't mean your husband is your god.
Being a woman, I need my independence. I choose not to be weak. Life is complicated and unpredictable. Things will not always go your way. If something goes wrong, I want to fight against it, not hide it to protect myself from the judgmental eyes of the society. I need to be an individual, who needs to be loved and not be protected. And I am sure, that is what the female you love and respect, your mother, your daughter, your sister, your wife, your friend needs from you.
